Many of us in our life come upon a time when we are confronted with dealing with grief. The grief process can be overwhelming, and emotional grief can have a strong physical effect as well.

Over the next few blogs we will look at the five stages of grief. Today we will look at Denial.

WHAT IS DENIAL?
  • A way to avoid conflict, disagreements, or disapproval from others.
  • A defensive response; protection from pain, hurt, or suffering.
  • Being unwilling to face problems on either a conscious or subconscious level.
  • A way of retaining our sanity when experiencing unbearable pain.
HOW DOES DENIAL LOOK IN OTHERS?
  • Appear to be irrational to those who know the problems and losses  they have suffered.
  • Appear to be calm and relaxed to those who do not know the problems and losses they have suffered.
  • Appear to be avoiding or rejecting those who are intent on confronting them with their problems.
WHAT ARE THE NEGATIVE CONSEQUENCES OF UNRESOLVED DENIAL?
  • Greater conflict between the deniers and the non-deniers.
  • The denier totally avoiding or withdrawing from everyone who knows of the loss or problem.
  • The denier becoming a social recluse.
HOW CAN WE DEAL WITH DENIAL OURSELVES?

  • Asking ourselves honestly why we are in denial.
  • Allowing ourselves to admit to being out of control.
  • Trusting others to help us with our problem.
  • Admitting our vulnerability and our need for assistance.
HOW CAN WE COPE WITH DENIAL IN OTHERS?
  • Have a great deal of patience in order to allow them the time it takes to finally confront their loss or problems.
  • Be accepting of the denial as a psychological defense that is a vehicle for them to retain their sanity.
  • Be ready with a rational perspective to help them refute their current irrational beliefs.
Please note that these are just a few of the points on each topic that show denial. For the complete list, and some great tools for coping with life's stressors, visit coping.org.