So while I am talking about weight loss programs and diets, I thought I'd stop and talk about something that I heard on the radio today. I was listening to my local country station, and heard an advertisement for some weight loss plan that I can't remember, and they were talking to the people in a family who had gotten on the program together. What a great way to do it!

What better way to take steps towards healthier living that to take them with your family. There are a lot of benefits that I can see from that, first and foremost is the fact that you have one of the best support groups you can get built in right at home. Also, if everyone in your family is trying to eat healthier, then you won't have the temptations of "bad food" laying around in your cupboards. Also, when you get those cravings knockin' at your door, you can turn to a loved one who is going through the same challenges you are for support.

Once I started thinking about this topic, I started doing some digging. Now, "The Biggest Loser" show on NBC did a family edition a couple years back. I am a huge fan of the show, and I loved how they brought the whole family in on this one. It was a great season to watch, as well as a great message to families everywhere.

This was the beginning of a great trend that I have been seeing, where television and radio are showing how families can reach their goals for healthy living together.

Another thing that I have found and am a big fan of is "Shaq's Big Family Challenge". (yep, that's the Shaq from the Miami Heat Basketball team). This is a website where you can get a free family report card that gives you a look at your family's health. If you choose to join the program, it's only $2 a week. With the membership you get:

• Kid friendly recipes
• Daily Meal Suggestions
• A food database
• Parents get a coaching playbook
• Tips for picky eaters
• An eating out guide
• A grocery shopping guide
• Exercise Plans
• And a lot more

Today I want to take a look at one of the companies that offer a type of "weight loss support system". I really do believe these systems are a good way to learn how to eat, and ultimately build a healthier lifestyle. There are a couple downfalls that we'll talk about, but all in all they are really beneficial.

Let's start with Jenny Craig.

Here's the deal: Jenny Craig is a program that not only helps you reach weight loss goals, but also make healthy changes in your lifestyle.

The Good.

This is a great system, right down to their website. It's not a diet, it's a plan for healthy living. The system addresses the three most important factors of weight loss and a healthy lifestyle:

• FOOD - A Healthy Relationship With Food
• BODY - An Active Lifestyle
• MIND - A Balanced Approach to Living

When your child is 3 or older, he/she will probably go to school.  Each school system is required by law to have special education programs for children with autism as well as other types of learning problems. If your little one exhibits severe symptoms, he/she may be placed in a self-contained class with other learning disabled children. If symptoms are more mild, like those of Asperger's Syndrome, a fully integrated regular education program with assistance from a special educator, would be a good choice. Each school system has its own techniques but they should all provide a structured, and secure environment where your child can feel safe. The program should emphasize social skills and functional communication as well as academics.  Also, it is to your advantage as a parent to keep in close contact with your child's teachers, so that you can work together and continue to train him/her at home.

Now for some alternative treatments that have been used in the past for the treatment of autism.

• Facilitated Communication is a technique used to help a child express feelings by having them to type their inner thoughts on a computer. Studies have shown that the messages typed describe the thoughts of the support provider. Recently there was a news blurb on television about a young autistic girl who could only communicate by typing on her computer. Amazing, isn't it.
• Holding Therapy is a technique in which a child is hugged by his/her parent for long periods of time, even if there is resistance. Proponents of this method believe that it helps to develop a bond between child and parent. Others say that it helps stimulate the brain by allowing the child sense his/her body boundaries. As of yet, there is no scientific evidence to support this.
• Auditory Integration Therapy is a technique in which a child listens to different sounds with the aim of improving language comprehension. Those who advocate this method believe that it helps those with autism receive more balanced sensory information from their surroundings. After scientific testing, this method has proven to be as effective as listening to music. Some parents have stated that they have seen behavior and language gains from this program.
• Dolman/Delcato Method is a program where children are made to crawl and move as they did through every stage of their early development. This is done so that they can learn some of their missed skills. Unfortunately, their is no scientific evidence to support this.

• A food plan that has been successful with some families consists of a gluten-free, casein-free diet. To eliminate these products however, is difficult because gluten (which is a casein-like substance) is found in cereal plants like wheat, oat, rye, and barley and casein is the major protein in milk.
• If you, as a parent would like to place your child on a special diet please consult with your pediatrician, and a nutritionist, before embarking on a program of your own.

• Herbal Mindsoothe Jr. available in capsules for adults or drops for children. This has been proven clinically to help balance serotinin levels and it works in a similar way as the Selective Serotonin Re-Uptake Inhibitors or SSRI's that are made synthetically.
• Pure Calm is an herbal formula which has been specially formulated to calm and soothe children and adults. This remedy comes in a liquid form so you disperse it with a medicine dropper for both children and adults. It may be taken for quick relief of sudden symptoms and is safe to use with most prescription drugs and herbal medicines. Unlike synthetic tranquilizing drugs which can become addictive as individuals build up a tolerance resulting in the need for higher dosages, Pure calm will not cause an addiction.
• Focus ADHD Formula helps to treat those who are hyperactive and can't concentrate. This natural remedy comes in a tincture that you can take with juice or water.
• Bright Spark is for severe cases of ADHD as well as anger management and defiance issues and can be used by itself or in combination with the Focus formula.
• Tantrum Tamer is an effective remedy for children who have extreme temper tantrums, sometimes with no provocation, or for those who become frustrated because they are unable to communicate their needs,etc. This particular formula helps to eliminate and/or reduce these symptoms. Tantrum Tamer has a pleasant taste and most children will take it willingly.

• http://www.autismspot.com/
• http://www.thetole.com/Autism.html
• http://www.theolympian.com/113/story/321945.html
• http://autism-programs.com/
• http://www.patientcenters.com/autism/news/holistic.html
• http://www.feelgoodcounseling.com/autism.htm

The only thing worth stealing is a kiss from a sleeping child.
 ~Joe Houldsworth

Today, I would like to continue with my series on autism and tell you about setting up a  treatment plan  with doctors, mental health practitioners, therapists and educators. This will include questions to ask and how to prepare yourself for meetings. Since there is so much information out there, about this subject alone, I have decided to break this blog up into two parts.

First off, you need to find the right practitioners to help set up an acceptable plan. A multi-disciplinary assessment team would be most beneficial and may consist of some, or all of the following doctors, and mental health therapists.

• Developmental pediatrician who treats health issues of children with delays and handicaps in development.
• Child psychiatrist is an MD who may aid in the initial diagnosis, provide help with behavioral issues, emotional adjustment and socialization. He/she may also prescribe medication if need be.
• Clinical psychologist is a specialist who understands the effects of developmental disabilities such as autism spectrum disorders. He/she might give your child psychological and assessment tests which are invaluable aids for treatment. In addition to this, a behavior modification program, as well as a program to teach social skills may be set up by your therapist.
• Educator or Educational Consultant to help set up an effective learning program.
• Occupational therapist who will focus on self-help skills such as teaching your child to dress him/herself, to eat properly, etc. Your little one may also need help with fine motor skills, movement coordination, and sensory integration which can be done in an occupational therapy setting.
• Physical therapist who can help your child to develop muscle strength by improving the use of bones, muscles, joints and nerves as well as motor skills and coordination.
• Speech/language therapist will help improve speech and language skills allowing your child to communicate more effectively.
• Social worker who will provide support as well as understanding, and/or become a case manager to help arrange treatment plans and other services needed.

1. Will the treatment result in harm to my child?
2. How will failure of the treatment affect my child and family?
3. Has the treatment been validated scientifically?
4. Are there specified assessment procedures?
5. How will the treatment be integrated into my child's current program?

1. How successful has the program been for other children?
2. How many children have gone on to placement in a regular school and how have they performed?
3. Do staff members have training and experience in working with children and adolescents with autism?
4. How are activities planned and organized?
5. Are there predictable daily schedules and routines?
6. How much individual attention will my child receive?How is progress measured? Will my child's behavior be closely observed and recorded?
7. Will my child be given tasks and rewards that are personally motivating?
8. Is the environment designed to minimize distractions?
9. Will the program prepare me to continue the therapy at home?
10. What is the cost, time commitment, and location of the program?

• Most people who are deeply grieving will still have lighter moments where the pain is less intense, (Emotional ups and downs) whereas with depression the emotions are constant and heavy.
• Those who are grieving may still have moments of "hope" for what the future may bring, while those suffering from depression will mostly feel "hopeless".

The main difference between grief and depression concerns the presence or absense of self-esteem and guilt. When a person is experiencing depression, there is typically a loss of self-esteem and overall feeling of guilt. This can be somewhat complicated, as some people will experience guilt as a result of the loss of a loved one, but this type of guilt is specific to the event of loss. It is helpful to consider seeking help through counseling if you are unsure about your reactions to the loss or would like support through the mourning process.

I once watched a television program about a very unhappy man named Sam who would stuff himself with junk food and then throw it all up. After doing this, he would go to the gym and work out for hours, only to go home and do the same thing all over again. He knew that he had a problem so he was  getting counseling in a group setting with others like him,  During the therapy session Sam and the others would have to discuss their eating patterns for the week, if they engaged in negative habits, they would have to admit it.  The mental health practitioner was just awful and she would scream at them for doing this.  Needless to say, the therapist's approach was more harmful than helpful. Sam kept binging and purging every time he was stressed out over something. Of course, this was a television show and they had to make it more juicy. In reality, during a mental health counseling session, the therapist will not embarrass you like this and if they do, it is time to find a new counselor.

Like anorexics that I dealt with in my last blog, bulimics are overly weight conscious.  They are constantly getting on a scale, looking in a mirror, and  measuring or pinching themselves to see if there is any fat. The self worth of an individual with bulimia is directly related to how they perceive their body shape and weight.

Believe it or not, binge eating is seen as a way to cope with life's stresses,  disappointments and poor body image. What is ingested is usually "comfort foods" like carbohydrates such as sweets, fats, and anything with high caloric content. This obsessive eating pattern is of course done in privacy as they don't want others to witness this inappropriate behavior.

As you can see, this mental health illness is a vicious cycle that can only broken through psychotherapy. Group therapy is also helpful because it gives the bulimic and their family support and understanding from others who have similar issues. No longer are they so alone.  There are hospitals and clinics with out patient programs to help those with eating disorders.

• Chamomile or Yarrow are recommended for their recuperative powers. Put 1 tsp of chamomile or yarrow in 1 cup of boiling water, let sit for 10 minutes, strain. Swallow 1 cup 3 times a day to help you feel better.

• Try geranium, lemon-balm, bergamot,  and rose oils  to alleviate  sadness and depression.
• If you are tense, anxious and easily  angered, try clary-sage, lavender, ylang-ylang, chamomile or sandlewood, they will help to relax and soothe you.

• Kava Kava root helps to soothe away anxious feelings. Ingest 1 tsp. of a tincture, or swallow several capsules 3-4 times a day or whenever you feel that you need it. If symptoms improve, take less.

• St. John's Wort may help to alleviate depression. Put 1 cup of hot water over 1 tsp of St. John's Wort, let steep and strain.  Drink 1 cup 2-3 times a day.  You can also ingest St. John's Wort as capsules, whichever you prefer. 4-6 weeks may pass however, before you note any improvement when taking this herb.

• Natrium chloratum is good for those of us who lose touch with our feelings.
• Calcium carbonicum is helpful if you are worried about things. It is also good for timidity and when you are cold.

• Magnesium is a good vitamin to take to prevent sweet cravings like chocolate.
• Chromium is great for balancing your sugar levels, because it alleviates the desire for sugar and carbohydrates.
• It is also important for you to take multi-vitamins and minerals to restore what was lost during vomiting.

First up is Anorexia, a mental health condition whose most distinguishing characteristic is the desire to be slim.  Granted, most of us women watch our calories so that we can keep our weight down, but anorexics have an irrational fear of putting on even one pound. Consequently, they are always monitoring their caloric intake and feel guilty whenever they eat. Women with this mental illness therefore are painfully thin and have no body fat at all, most of them truly look like skin on bones. Their "starvation diet" may cause a complete breakdown of the the fatty tissue lying just below their skin. We need a certain amount of subcutaneous fat to be healthy.

Anorexics are very much out of touch with reality when it comes to their body image, they perceive themselves as fat, when in actuality they are dangerously thin.  A scale is an important part of their daily routine, they don't merely weigh themselves once a day, but, rather throughout the day.  They are very obsessive about it. If they do eat, they are compulsive about burning up the calories, so they may exercise vigorously. In addition to this, an anorexic may ingest laxatives and pills to stop their hunger, or they may purge themselves. This is the mental health illness call Bulimia, which I will feature in my next blog.  Some of them even refuse to eat at all, at which point their illness  becomes a hazard to their health. If they go indefinitely without food, they will end up being hospitalized and fed intravenously. If left untreated the mortality rate is about 5-18%.

Those suffering from this disorder may actually be  hungry but still refuse to eat.  They have an extremely poor self image and try to control their surroundings and their emotions by starving themselves. Quite often, eating disorders come from internal and external conflicting forces as well as stress, anger, anxiety, and sadness. Unfortunately, refusing to eat is the only way that an anorexic  deals  with these issues, but it is a very negative way of coping. They may think to themselves, "you can't make me eat", therefore gaining the upper hand, or so they think.   Some people truly believe that they don't deserve to enjoy life's simple pleasures, namely eating, hence, they starve themselves .

• 1 oz. dandelion
• 1 oz. centaury
• 1 oz. licorice bark
• 1 oz. peppermint leaves
• Put 1 cup of water that has been boiled, over 1 tsp. of the tea. 
• Let it sit for 10 minutes covered, then strain it.
• Drink 1 cup before meals.

I would like to briefly mention that there are many relaxation techniques they include yoga, deep breathing and meditation to help control stress, discouragement and fear that are part of this illness.

Last but not least is the alternative medical practice of acupressure which can stimulate appetite by working on pressure points.

• Approximately 20 minutes before eating, apply pressure to the area halfway between the sternum and navel, do this for 3 minutes.
• You can also press firmly on the bottom of the nail located on the pinky finger for 5 minutes to accomplish the same thing

 Remember, In order to have a healthy mind and body we need to eat healthy foods!

Thirty years ago this February, my grandmother (Ninny) died.  I can’t believe it’s been that long.  In some ways it seems like just yesterday my mother was telling me Ninny needed an operation on her stomach.  In can still picture her the day she came home from the hospital, weak and gaunt.  I can remember how she steadily lost even more weight over the next 18 months. And I get an instant stomachache when I remember the overwhelming fear and uncertainty that swirled around me when she died.   (While my parents weren’t neglectful, they were young when I was born.  Ninny offered me the stability and security they weren’t able to give.)

Thirty years is an awfully long time.  On one hand, it seems impossible that I lived that long without her.  On the other, seems like she was never physically here at all.  Some days I honestly have a tough time remembering what life was like, what I was like, when she was still alive.  Like the Wizard of Oz movie, there are two parts of me, one part in techno color (before death) and the other in black and white (after death.)  The techno color Danielle is a little fuzzy in my memory.    Back then, was I optimistic?  Yes.  Was I naïve?  Of course.  Was I hopeful for the future?  Absolutely.   Then life threw me a curve and all that changed.

A lot has happened in the 30 years between then and now.  For 2-1/2 decades I was defined by my denial, anger and grief.  I made mistakes (millions), lived selfishly (I lost someone I loved, wasn’t I entitled?) and spent far too much time feeling sorry for myself.  And in the end, it brought me nothing but more grief, anger, sadness and eventually, depression.

Today I’ve settled into a nice life as a wife and mother of a teenager but it’s only recently I’ve come to understand how Ninny’s death affected my life and made me who I am.  Losing someone you love sucks, I’ll be the first to admit it, but like everything else in life, you can learn from it and become a better person.  Realizing that came in a series of baby steps, hits and misses, triumphs and failures.  Honestly, there isn’t a therapy I haven’t tried. Alternative medicine, relaxation techniques, meditation, visualization, drugs (as in anti-depressants) and support groups…been there, done that!     

What’s important is that I didn’t give up.  I’m not always a “glass-is-half-full” kind of person but I am competitive and I used that to my advantage.  When dealing with my depression and grief, no matter how hard things were, I was determined not to let it beat me.  It’s been a long battle but guess what?  My perseverance paid off.  Sure there are days when I feel sad or hopeless, but they occur with less severity and frequency than they once had.

So, what’s the moral of my story?  To have hope, to not give up, to understand that what you are feeling can temporary, to believe you can get better and to know that you aren’t alone. 

"Worrying is like a rocking chair, it gives you something to do, but it gets you nowhere."  ~Glenn Turner

Have you ever been in a crowd of people when suddenly your heart starts to race and your breathing quickens? Then without warning, you find yourself unable to catch your breath, you break out into a sweat, and become lightheaded and dizzy. This is known as a panic attack and is usually manifested by shortness of breath that causes us to hyperventilate. When we hyperventilate, we exhale more carbon dioxide than we generate, thus decreasing the levels of carbon dioxide in our body. When this occurs we feel lightheaded and dizzy. Over 90 million people around the world suffer from this malady. So you are not alone.

A panic attack is a stress related disorder coming from extreme anxiety and fear. People who have this mental health illness may fear that they are having a heart attack because the symptoms are similar. In addition to these signs, you may tremble, have chills, hot flashes, feel nauseous, have cramps, have tingling or numbness in your hands, feel as if you are  choking, and/or feel like you have left your body.  As you can well imagine,  this sickness can hold you hostage and destroy your life.

You may ask yourself why is this happening? Sometimes a panic attack arises for no apparent reason, but most of the time there are underlying psychological issues that need to be dealt with. Studies have shown that most people who have this illness are very uncomfortable in social situations, have suffered a childhood trauma such as abuse, are perfectionists, or merely worry about everything.

There is help out there for those of you who suffer from this debilitating syndrome. If it is severe, you should consult with your physician to make sure you are not having heart problems. Once physical illness is ruled out you may want to consult with a counselor or psychotherapist who will help you get to the root of your problems. Your mental health counselor may suggest prescription medication to help alleviate the symptoms as well as therapy. Alternative, natural remedies may also be effective.

Cognitive and Behavior Therapy

Cognitive therapy deals with the mental processes of perception, memory, judgment, and reasoning. It is quite helpful because it works on changing the underlying thought patterns that are causing your panic attacks. It is important for you to learn how to alter your negative ways of thinking so that your anxiety and fear subsides. Once you are able to do this, the next step is to actually change your behavior, this is known as behavior therapy. In the comfort of a psychotherapists office, he/she will help you to identify the habits that are causing the attacks and teach you to use positive thoughts to alleviate the symptoms. Perhaps your therapist will suggest that you join a support group where you will relate to others having similar symptoms, as well as those who have been successful in controlling their anxieties.

Here are some relaxation techniques that are effective

Take a bath to help you relax and soothe away your fears. Mix 2 tsp of jasmine oil with 5 tbsp of heavy cream. Put this blend into your bath water and submerge yourself for about 20-25 minutes. Jasmine warms you up while helping you to feel more in balance. Lavender and Rose oils are also good for stress and anxiety.  

You may be able to prevent hyperventilating by consciously breathing slowly and deeply as soon as you feel the symptoms coming on. Inhale into your diaphragm and hold your breath for three seconds and exhale.  Your exhale should be slower than your inhale. While doing this, try to visualize yourself breathing the fear out of your body.

Biofeedback has been used extensively in treating panic attacks.  Sit comfortably in a chair and move your buttocks to the edge. Make sure that your feet are flat on the ground. Place your arms on your thighs allowing your hands to dangle between your legs without meeting. Next, let your body collapse inward while your head hangs forward and close your eyes. Remember to relax your neck muscles.  Repeat this technique whenever you feel stressed out and anxious.

Yoga is a wonderful way to ease tension, anxiety and fear. The "fire-breathing" pose, a type of hatha yoga is quite helpful. Sit on the floor or a pillow with your legs crossed. Keep your spine straight and raise your arms above your head. Keep your palms together. Close your eyes and become aware of your abdomen. Inhale and exhale rapidly for a few times. Next, let the air out completely. Finally, take a deep breath as you exhale, drop your arms slowly. You may repeat this exercise whenever you need to.

Try Medicinal Teas

• Motherwort tea is very good for an accelerated heart beat that comes from anxiety. Take 1 cup of boiling and pour it over 1 tsp of the herb that has been dried. Allow the tea to steep for 10 minutes and strain. Drink one cup 3 times a day for 2-4 weeks. Don't add any sweeteners.
• Hops tea is used to reduce stress and nervousness. Add 1 cup of boiling water to 1 tsp of hop flowers. Let sit for 15 minutes and strain. Ingest 1 cup 2-3 times a day.

Recently an acquaintance confided in me that she was feeling so depressed since her divorce that she could hardly get out of bed in the morning.  I smiled and said, “I know how you feel.  That’s happened to me too.”  It was a simple statement and show of understanding but what was so amazing was that I admitted it at all.

Let’s get this out of the way:  I am one of the millions of people who suffer from a mental illness - specifically, depression.  I’ve been treated for it off and on since I was 19 years old and been so ashamed that I managed to keep it a secret from even my closest friends.  Depression has always been the skeleton in my closet.  I had become so good at hiding it that if you met me, you’d never suspect a thing.  Once when I told a friend I was feeling “a little down” his response was, “Really?  You?”

Being in the medical field (I’m currently a student), I’ll be the first one to tell a patient that depression is nothing to be ashamed of, that it is an illness like diabetes or asthma.  But somehow, I hadn’t been able to believe those words or apply them to my life.  Because of my secret, I denied myself the things that someone with depression needs (a support system), pretended to be someone I wasn’t (a happy person) and prolonged my unhappiness.  It was exhausting!

The truth is, I had no one to blame but myself.  Pittsburgh is overflowing with excellent doctors and mental health professionals, most of which I’ve seen.  Unfortunately, when the questions got tough and I was forced to discuss something that made me uncomfortable, I checked out.  And the harder my therapist tried to make me talk, the more I’d clam up until eventually I cancelled my remaining appointments and moved on to another doctor and repeated the cycle…over and over and over.

But last year I had a breakthrough, got to the root of the problem (grief) and started to understand what had been making me feel so sad for so long.  I’ve changed a lot in those 12 months and will be blogging about my experiences, treatments, good days and not so good days. Most importantly, now I really do believe that depression is nothing to be ashamed of…and if my story helps even one person, this journey has been worth it!

---Danielle

My next series of blogs will focus on Stress Related Disorders such as anxiety, test anxiety, panic attacks, phobias and depression. Stay Tuned!

The mental health condition "stress" is becoming more and more prevalent in today's society.  It seems to pop up in news stories, everyday conversations and in medical evaluations. What exactly is stress and how does it effect us?  According to the dictionary, it is, " A mentally or emotionally disruptive or upsetting condition occurring in response to adverse external influences and capable of affecting physical health".

Mentally upsetting circumstances may range from mere humdrum situations that we deal with daily, like work stressors, to severe worry, extreme sickness, trauma and dramatic life changes such as the death of a loved one.  Stress affects every system of our body and can slow down or inhibit our ability to cope. In some cases, it is so devastating that we are unable to function at all. Psychologically, we all react to stress differently some of us may become anxious, have panic attacks, become depressed, have problems sleeping, or have mood swings.

Our bodies react to stress as if it were a life threatening situation.  This occurs because our Pituitary gland sends a message to our adrenal glands causing them to release the hormones cortisol, adrenaline and noradrenalin. As a result, the fight or flight response is set in motion. This is manifested physically by muscle tension, as well as an increase heart rate, blood pressure, pulse and respiration. When this takes place, it puts our body in a state of constant alertness, waiting for something threating to happen. If this continues for a prolonged period of time our immune system becomes compromised and we become physically or mentally ill.

Do you think that you are stressed out?  Try this test and see. If 2 of these statements relate to you, take a look at your particular circumstances and see what you can do to alleviate the stressors in your life before they cause health problems.

• You have difficulty relaxing and or sleeping because you have too many things on your mind.
• It is not easy for you to listen when others are speaking.
• You feel irritable, anxious and rushed most of the time.
• It is hard for you to concentrate on things.
• You no longer enjoy doing the things that used to be enjoyable.

Hydrotherapy is a great way to relieve stress. Take a bath with either Lemon-Balm or Lavender essential oil. These two aromas enhance your olfactory nerves and sooth the limbic system (the part of the brain dealing with basic drives and emotions).  When you immerse yourself in water it also helps to decrease your heart rate. If you prefer taking a shower, the first thing to do is let cold water hit the outside and inside of your right arm. Then allow the water to run down your back, while doing this, be sure to have the water run over your right shoulder then left shoulder. Lastly, let the water spray the outside and inside of your left arm. You may be thinking, cold water, brrrr!!! But it actually helps to stabilize your metabolism. If you like, rub lavender or lemon balm on yourself to help you calm down even more.

Too much caffeine and sugar also cause anxiety, nervousness, excitability, etc. So don't drink that third cup of coffee, and stop your children from eating too much sugar. There are great foods that you can eat to help keep you calm, such as Chamomile Tea and nuts.  Nuts are an excellent source of vitamins that promote a healthy cardiovascular and nervous system. They also decrease your stress level and increase your ability to focus. Chamomile tea has a calming effect.

Exercise is a wonderful way to release those "feel good" endorphins. I walk with my dog practically everyday, it is not only good for her but it helps me too.  If you don't like to walk, try bicycle riding, running, jogging, swimming, or join a gym class.

Try yawning, it relieves tension because it stretches the muscles in your jaw, and increases your oxygen supply. When you yawn, try raising your arms. Do this throughout the day to alleviate some stress.

Finally, I would like to discuss some medicinal herbs that may help to relieve stress.

• Kava Kava relaxes your muscles and helps to alleviate anxiety. This herb contains a type of acid that stops the fight/flight messages from going to the brain. This allows you to relax and remain calmer.
• Chinese Ginseng helps to stop exhaustion from nervousness. In addition to this, it supports proper functioning of your adrenal glands.
• St. Johns Wort is rich in a substance called hypericin which decreases depression and anxiety.  It is able to do this by enhancing the production of serotonin which is the chemical that allows you to rest, unwind and focus.  Be careful about taking St. John's Wort because it can may you very sensitive to the sun.

• Digging deeper into PTSD.
• "Beyond the Yellow Ribbon" Program for returning soldiers
• How "Battle Buddies" offer support
• A support group for families of returning Soldiers
• New report shows cases of PTSD triple in combat exposed vets.

• Questions to ask your doctor
• Antidepressants
• SSRI's

• The Stages of Grief
• Grief Support Groups
• Kids and Grief

• A personal take on dealing with grief and depression.
• Self Awareness: Finding your passion
• Blogging helps your mental health. Really!
  

• Study shows that volunteering improves your mental health.
• What's good for the soul is good for the mind!
• Issues that affect mental health travel in packs.
• Bipolar disorder and epilepsy.

• The path to mental health starts in the body.
• Eating Healthier for better mental health.
• Eat better, feel better, think better!
• Sleeping your way to good health.
• 20 Foods you should have at home.
• Eating healthier for better physical and mental health.

On Dying and Compassion

In my last post we took a look at the stages of grief and the life and work of Dr. Elisabeth Kubler-Ross. In reading about her work I learned that she fought to her last days for the rights of dying patients and loved ones to be treated with respect and compassion.

When facing those hard last moments you should offer the gift of support and understanding. Be present in heart, not only physically. Listen without judging and respect the feelings of those around you. Remember not everyone reacts the same. Be there when needed, offer your companionship, but know that often the dying person needs time by themselves. When they express their wish to be left alone, honor it.

At the time of death spirituality is generally very important for the one making the transition. If they have a different religious path than yours, be supportive and participate, this is not the time to impose your own beliefs. Hospice Net offers these excellent advise:

Touch your loved one in a way that is comforting to your loved one (hold hands, rub her head, snuggle...). Let your physical presence be part of what nurtures a place of trust.

Tell your loved one you love him. If he is unable to respond then answer for him. "And I believe you love me too."

Tell them that you feel God's love in this place surrounding you and her. Let her know your trust is now in God. If you can express your experience of God's love/presence then describe it to her. If it feels natural to you, you could use a scriptural image (i.e. God has the hairs on your head numbered, so I believe that God knows where you are and knows your name).

Tell them that God will continue to support you after she is gone and that you will make it in the future with your faith in God and your belief that she is at peace with God.

Forgive your loved one of any past estrangement/ behavior/words. If he is unable to respond then answer for him, "And I believe you forgive me too."

Give your loved one permission to let go. Again assure her that you trust the move from your loving hands into God's loving arms. Offer words such as "God is here with me and you, let's hold on to God now," "God's arms are open to you," "I am here for you, and so is God."

Of course they use the word God, but I believe that spirit is one and divinity has many names. Use the one that brings comfort to you and your loved ones. Quality of life should include dying, do the most to assure you and your loved ones go through this transition with respect and compassion. To quote Dr. Kubler-Ross, "The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, known struggle, known loss, and have found their way out of the depths.  These persons have an appreciation, a sensitivity and an understanding of life that fills them with compassion, gentleness, and a deep loving concern. Beautiful people do not just happen." 

 May love and compassion surround you and yours in life and at the inevitable time of death. Take care of each other with an out-most giving heart, let not a moment go by when you don't express your feelings for those around you. Live well and at the end of your journey, die well.